The first single from ‘Brown & Orange’ is set to be released next month. It’s called ‘The Happiest Boy’ and will feature an animated film clip from David Blumenstein. Stay tuned.

(Brought to you by Kashin the Boy Wizard. Fans of Harry Potter may enjoy this new series from former advertising mogul turned debut author B.J. Downer. Join Kashin and his one male and one female friend as they attend their first year at a non-copyrighted learning centre and do battle with the eerily familiar ‘Lord Nemesis.’)

• I’ve got a piece in the current Frankie magazine. After shopping my columns around for ages, this savvy, national publication has welcomed me with arty arms. More columns are set to appear in future issues. I believe I also have a piece in the current JMag as well.

• The album is ‘coming along.’ The band is ‘going well.’ You heard it first. Or second possibly – is a new fan site started up by some Norwegian kids who already have a leaked copy of my album. This is good as it’s more finished than my one, so I’m currently working out a rate to buy it from them. Expect to hear something within two months. This has nothing to do with the album, I’m just a really bad fortune teller. Band wise, our main issues have been mixing. Andy’s shy and Hugh has turret’s – no I mean sound mixing – it seems there’s 984 extra things that can sonically go awry for a live band. We’re regularly working with our cherished colleague Dave Swinton to iron these out during forthcoming Melbourne gigs. Who says blokes can’t iron!

• I think I’ve come up with a band name. ‘The Bedroom Philosopher & His Awkwardstra.’ Thanks to everyone who made suggestions, especially Dani (& The Acoustic Blankets), Betty (just The Bedroom Philosopher And), Jenny (& The Repetitive Strain Injuries), Tan (& The Melbourne Lesbians) and Corey (& The Unemployed Mariarchi Band).

• After ten years duelling with the ‘smoky bull’ I have lanced smoking. (apparently there’s a link between nicotine and ability to compose convincing metaphors.) I believe I can say this as it’s been over 12 weeks now, cold bull. (Gee I really know how to milk the bull on this imagery stuff). I must note this is barring two renaissance cigarettes I was ‘allowed’ on the eve of the smoking ban in pubs and clubs. Despite this I have found it to be mostly not awful. While finances and health failed to be factors worthy of giving up, I finally stumbled upon a human emotion who’s sheer power alone has ensured me detox victory. Vanity. My singing voice has improved dramatically since ‘taking up oxygen.’ And if you’re still a smoker I promise I won’t bully you into quitting, no bull.

• My friend and favourite local writer Vanessa Berry has released her debut book ‘Strawberry Hills Forever.’ It is a collection of her finest writing from her ten year zine career. Vanessa has written an academic thesis on op-shop culture and much of it appears in this book. It’s available in independent bookstores or check-it online at:

• Two million megalitres of water, four times the volume of Sydney Harbour evaporates from insufficient water storages from the Darling river every year. Some experts predict the river will die within years.

• Cheesymite scrolls from Bakers Delight have gone up to $2.20.

• Facebook.