Click here to join the I’M SO POST MODERN LYRIC WRITING MASTERCLASS, and have a chance to write your own lyrics and have them graded by The Bedroom Philosopher himself!
I’m So Post Modern by The Bedroom Philosopher
I’m so postmodern that I just don’t talk anymore, I wear different coloured t-shirts according to my mood.
I’m so postmodern that I work from home as a surf life saving consumer hotline.
I’m so postmodern all my clothes are made out of sleeping bags, I don’t need pockets, I’m a pocket myself.
I’m so postmodern I go to parties I’m not invited to and locate the vegemite and write my name on everyone.
I’m so postmodern that I write reviews for funerals, and heckle at weddings from inside a suitcase.
I’m so postmodern I’m going to adopt a child, and teach him how to knit, and call him Adolf Diggler.
I’m so postmodern that I break dance in waiting rooms, play Yahtzee in nightclubs, at three in the afternoon.
I’m so postmodern I only go on dates that last thirteen minutes, via walky talky, while hiding under the bed.
I’m so postmodern I invite strangers to my house, and put on a slide show of other people’s Nans.
I’m so postmodern I went home and typed up everything you said and printed it out in wingdings and gave it back to you.
I’m so postmodern I held an art exhibition – a Chuppa Chup stuck to a swimming cap, and no one was invited.
I’m so postmodern I make alphabet soup, and dye it purple, and pour it on the lawn.
I’m so postmodern I request Hey Mona on karaoke, then sing my life story to the tune of My Sharona.
I’m so postmodern I only think in palindromic haikus – “Madam, I, Glenelg, I’m Adam!”
I’m so postmodern that I sit down to wee, and stand up to poo, at job interviews.
I’m so postmodern that I dress up as Santa, in the middle of August, and haunt golf courses.
I’m so postmodern that I cut off all my hair, and knitted it into a beanie, and threw it off a bridge.
I’m so postmodern that I stole everyone’s mail, and cut them up into a ransom note and hid it in a thermos.
I’m so postmodern I take my lego to the supermarket and build my own shopping trolley, and only buy one nut.
I’m so postmodern I wrote a letter to the council – .I think it was ‘M.’
I’m so postmodern I bought a round the world plane ticket, and stuffed my clothes with eggplant and pretended it was me.
I’m so postmodern I’ve got a tattoo of my pin number in hieroglyphics on my neighbour’s guide
dog.
I’m so postmodern I fought my way into parliament and made a law banning Nuttelex, and then moved to Spain.
I’m so postmodern that I iron all my lettuce leaves, put my shirts in the crisper – they’re real crisp.
I’m so postmodern I give live mice to buskers, dirty tea towels to the Mormons, and pavlova to crabs.
I’m so postmodern that I live in a tent, on a platform of skateboards that’s tied to a tram.
I’m so postmodern I write four thousand-word essays on the cultural significance of party pies.
I’m so postmodern I recite Shakespeare at KFC drive thru, through a megaphone, in sign language.
I’m so postmodern I’m going to watch the Olympics on a black & white TV, with the sound down.
I’m so postmodern I go to the gym after hours, push up against the door, then cry myself to sleep.
I’m so postmodern I wrote a trilogy of novels from the perspective of a possum that Jesus patted once.
I’m so postmodern that I marry all my friends, soak myself in metho, and tell them that they’ve changed.
I’m so postmodern I bought every book written in 1963 as a reading challenge, and clogged up a waterslide.
I’m so postmodern I think I might be a god in my undies rolling in sugar, in the carpark of a rodeo.
I’m so postmodern I prerecorded this song, and laced a message subliminally telling Shane Porteous to buy a smock.
260 Comments
I’m so post modern that I…really like this ..song…
*weeps*
LUVN THE SONG!
Its Awsome!
Im So Postmodern That I Cant Stop Listening To This Song!
Im so post-modern i bought the CD instead of downloading it off the Internet
I’m not post-modern, but I _LOVE_ this song!
(Actually, I was trying to write the lyrics myself, and got up to the Shakespeare one before I was given the link to this page from my girlfriend. :-D )
But… What is “Nuttelex”?
Nuttelex is a vegan margarine that my mum likes. It’s a really pale yellow/white colour and is packaged in a cube with a picture of a squirrel.
I love this song, but I’ve only heard it twice on triple j.. ironically on the way to a concert where they played a Chicago medly. Just so you know, Im buying the album for christmas.
If you’re reading this you’d better do a rendition at Falls Festival this year man!
no matter how many times i listen to this song, one line always leaves me in stitches … i couldnt say which line because it changes depending on my mood :-P
I’m so postmodern that I armwrestle dead penguins twice weekly in case it rains. Also, I like your song. It has words.
I’m old enough to be one of the Other People’s Nans (although I’m not, yet …) and my boyfriend , who is old enough to be anyone’s pop, bought me your CD for Christmas coz I liked your so postmodern song. Would love to see your slideshow …
im so post modern that i bought a teddy bear, painted it pink, and gave it to a lobster
i’m so post modern that at falls i watched you sing and got a photo taken with the lead singer from faker and then realised you lived near where i do.. nifty
this song is just so indeed post modern!!!
so rad it hurts!!! …
so post modern it hurts!!!
i voted for it in the triple j hottest 100 because im just as post modern (well i’m not really but i’d like to think so) and everyone should be as pretend post modern and do the same
xxxxxxx
Love this song, as always. Not quite postmodern – I barely keep up with myself. Anyway.
Could the “Law banning Nuttelex” line possibly be a reference to your strong dislike of Megan the vegan? Just wondering. Seemed suspicious.
Hey! I came to that conclusion too!
But the stuff can also taste pretty dodgy sometimes, depending on the taste already inhabiting your mouth.
I’m so post modern that i cant think of something post modern to say on this comments page. Dammit. You’re really cool btw. Love the songs. =D
I’m so post modern that for the fist time i herd your song at the falls it has been stuck in my head ever since and im gonna buy your CD soon but im sleepy so í wont do it now and i think your my real dad and i am striving to be like you because i’m so postmodern……
ew… vegemite…
This song is pritty muchly the best thing since sliced bread, aint laughed so hard EVER.
Did the bedroom philosopher do that abc song at falls as well?
I was kinda drunk off my titties at the time.
Awesome song btw!!!1
Heard you on JJJ, Saw & met you at falls, voted for this song on the hottest 100….this song is the best ever!
I know her up above me in this comment list. she is nice. lots of people are nice that I know.
i’m So postmodern i read all these replies, call them personally and ask them what they think about John Canane’s choice of toenail polish
your song roks it is so awesom
Hng on, this isn’t the Tim Rogers website.
I was at that 1997 silverchair concert. The person in front of me was wearing a Hanson tshirt and I though Adalita was a boy.
Hey! Mrs Mia Wallace??
disco..
I’m so postmodern that I printed out the lyrics in black and white and posted them around my office here in London…
i’m so postmodern i printed your comments, in hebrew. i sleep with them at night. I’m so post modern my fish is my religious leader, and he should be yours
btw, im not really post modern im just so jealous that im not like you all
im so post modern that i tried toi buy this album at a retirement home riding a shetland pony.
im so post modern that i hold funerals for grass hoppers, soaked nail vanish, glued to a foosball table.
omg i just want to take this song to a shabu shabu restaurant, cook it in that mystery soup then roll in it naked
This song is genius
i’m so postmodern i rode a donkey to Atlantis, then swam in Loch Ness, with a picture of the Queen.
god this is randomness!
I aM So poStmOderN i dRaw Stick FIguRe PictUres oN TreEs, WiTh a BIrO.
Yeah…I just heard the song yesterday and sent it to everyone back home in Canada….we shouldn’t let others miss out on comedy gold!
I’m so postmodern that im writting a comment about an awsome song!
i’m so… going to say that i really like this song without referring to post-modernism… *sigh* there goes that one.
I’m So Postmodern I … Okay, I’ll be serious this time… this is a great song and I wanted to vote for it in the hottest 100 this year… but my email was broken.So I resolved my teenage angt by stalking Liam Gallagher, just to tell him to lay off the Kaiser Chiefs, it’s not very nice…
very funny song… a little too funny maybe. i reckon someone should write a song about the fact eating to much peanut butter makes you an instant arsehole
I don’t like peanut butter. I’m sure that apricot jam has far more appealing qualities.
Australia’s so post modern they voted Bernard Fanning 71 spots above Im So Postmodern in the triple j hottest 100…
worst
yeah, congrats on making the hottest 100. im still mad at australia for voting for bernard, its dreadful
I’m so post modern I put nacho cheese in my pants, threw up on my shirt then hugged kittens on the freeway.
I’m so post modern I drank the bong water, before it was used.
I’m so post modern I eat books like “The complete works of tolstoy” then wipe my mouth with the bible.
I’m so post modern, I e-mailed Sigmund Freud and said “Hello Daddy”
Well thats all i could think of, so yea, great song, very well post modern.
im so postmodren that i comment on songs that dont actully exist….
except for this song its absolutly hillarious. well done.
nredom tsop
I agree about Bernard Fanning- alright song but it kinda took me by surprise.As for the guy’s rude messages above me…GET A LIFE!!!
Anyway…it is nice to see more people are getting to know this song and other people’s adaptations to it.
P.S- Big Day Out rocked!!!
I agree!
The bidding didn’t get any higher than $1 for Alex Kapranos, even though half the audience put their hands up =p
Pat is a fat lard and cheese him up!
I agree with SAM IS FAT’s comment i do like cheese and i think that Mia Wallace should shut her fat face…or she can eat my poo poo
Honestly chaps, I’m from England (Hampshire to be exact) and i don’t come across many songs like this one. I think this is marvellous. I’ve shown all my friends in England and we think its smashing. Top work pilots!
PS. Mia please leave Sam alone, its not his fault he’s a little slow
don’t dis my song lads I mean it I poured my heart and soul into those lyrics and you just have to shoot me down goodd thing Im a tank
NO IM BERNARD FANNING!!!
but thankyou, all that the fake Bernard has said is in fact true. I am crushed. Why does everyone have to be so mean to me. BLAH BLAH BLAH POWDERFINGER ARE BETTER!!! I AM POWDERFINGER GODDAM U!!! Y!!!
Rock On Sam!!!
I LIKE CHEESE
EAT MY POO POO
I love you all unconditionally, but…NO teasing in my e-kitchen please! Or else I’ll set Kerry the Metaphysical Drummer onto you. He knows where you all e-live. When he/she gets mad they send out a bizarre virus of kirstey alley picking her toenails and rubbing balm into her heels and she just sits on the corner of your screen and no matter what you click or press she won’t go away.
Superlicious thanks Pooglets! I’m so overjoyed and weeping and eating toast and all of the above. I vote for all of you in the Hottest 1 of life! Get ready for the dance remix of ‘I’m So PostModern’ on a forthcoming double a-side single with a remixed ‘Folkstar.’ It’s going to be seriously post-contemporary!
Saw you at Falls. Laughed.
I’m sorry guys… I didn’t know you all felt so strongly for Sam Is fat…and I don’t hate Bernard Fanning, I just said I wasn’t expecting him to be on number 1! my head that night was somewhere in between an icecream binge and suffering withdrawals from Spongebob Squarepants.
Anyway, did Alex Kapranos really only get $1?! Surely that Scottsman is worth $3.50!
Keep up the good work Justin, you deserved much higher than #72 on hottest 100!
BATMAN WAS HERE
Wow! this comment list just keeps getting bigger and bigger! But it’s not a bad thing.
my brother made up another lyric spontaneously after listening to this on the hottest 100 [congrats by the way] because i bought 12 bread rolls for 5 people:
heh-hem
“I’m so post modern that i buy twelve thousand bread rolls and mail them to people whos names start with L”
i thought it was a good one
i love this song! you got into triple j’s hotest 1`00 with it congratulations! my favourite line is “i’m so post modern i make alphabet soup, dye it purple and throw it on the lawn”
it’s great! :D
Dude, you better get on Tripe J’s C.D! I’m peeved about Bernard Fanning AND the Gorillaz! Why are conformists voting and icky-ing up the votes!
you rock hard! alla my friends are falling in love with your song! :D
I wish i could’ve voted but my computer is “so postmodern” it seems that it’s too good to work for me. grrrr.
this is the awsomest song ever! its just so cool and random..love every second of it!!
Omfg Mia Wallace how could u bee so meeeeean!!! BLAM BLAM …………………………………………………………. *cry*
anyonw who said im so post modern i replied to this thread should slam their head in a cardoor and then finish themselves off
DURRRRRR PAT EATS POO POO
i’m sorry, Sam, but I did apologise.
Anyway, good news: this song has reached Sea FM!( A very popular radio station on the central coast of NSW,) and now I’ve heard it twice on that station! Someone rang up and requsted it in the all- aussie hour. That’s pretty good for a station who usually only plays Pussycat Dolls and radio-friendly MOR rock.
P.S RHCP rock!
go die
ok well i only heard this song this arvo but i love it, it has truly inspired me!!!!! very inspiring song indeed…..
dearie me, Sam- don’t worry, be happy!
It takes a lot less effort to be nice :)
I heard a rumor Justin was going to be at the big day out next year.
Bring on Bedroom Philosopher T shirts!
Oh! Don’t tease Mia, we can only hope as of yet.
Tre Cool! I’m wif u Sam!!!!
has anyone else heard that rumor, or am I too gullible? Well, only Justin knows for sure!
I’m not teasing, but my friends most probably were…
With all these suggestions, there’s probably enough to write a sequel!
I have one: I’m so postmodern I sent a lettuce in the mail to the queen so she’d give me a raddish of diplomatic immunity.
I’m so postmodern i bought a teddy bear at a 2nd hand clothes shop, cut off its ears and reshaped it to look like a duck, stuffed it with baked beans and sent it floating in the ocean with a note in its beak reading “im so postmodern”.
Happy birthday to me…
I’m so post modern I threw a party 9 months to the day I was born so I could celebrate the day I was concieved.
Love the song. Desrved higher than #72. It feels like somethings missing at school without you alex
your so postmodern you wrote a song about it? brilliance, loving it
man i love the song
the first time i heard it i was in stitches
thanks for being funny jusin
Im so post modern i dont listen to music i have it sent to my brain teelepathically, this one i liked.
I’m so post modern I take “illegal immigrants”, provide them remote, indefinite accommodations, wait until they crack, and send them back home.
I’m so post-modern i made my own radio show, called it Panasonic and chucked out all my curtains
I’m So Postmodern that i bought a calculator, translated the instructions to hebrew and sent them to myself
how can you be the real bernard fanning when you can’t even spell bernard?
the clip for this song is great
i bet that Sam looks on the dancefloor..mia eat my poo poo please..
this song was a sick one.
i enjoyed it.
that is all.
Love this song!! Was good to see you perform it at UC. Love your humour.
i wil admit to downloading all my music off the net. i havent bought a cd in years, firstly because all the songs i wanted where by artists that can afford it, or the rest of the cd was so shit that humainly disposing of it in a shalow grave would be an insult to mother nature. but i think ill buy your cd. not sure why as i try not to think to much as that leads to sanity and rationalisation. so in short you could probale use the dosh and your a hoot, worth a punt at any rate.
I’m so post modern that i rewrote a history book, wrapped it in alfoil and mailed it to myself.
ho hum
I think I love me, and I like this song
I’m so post modern that I train pandas, dress them up as humans and enter them into the symmetrise swimming events in the olympics.
I’m so post modern that I bought a welcome mat, wrote a note saying I noticed that you have a poor quality mat, then replace it with the poorer one I bought.
Man, I love this song. Though seriously – “I’m so post-modern I write four thousand-word essays on the cultural significance of party pies,” – doesn’t everyone do that?
Midge.
PS. I’m so post-post-modern I worship santa claus, eat nothing but rubber and like to smell other people’s feet. And just one ‘post’ isn’t good enough for me.
Any chance of a sequel, Justin? Pinky said something about it a while back.
I’m sure Hannah Paige would be down with the idea, too!
Hey Justin! It’s Ben the infinate rainbow spacebag of cosmic yay-yay here! my 2 bros went to your gig at the mandarin club last nite! they loved it they thought u were heaps funny. Thanks for signing the Cd for me, u shud have an all ages gig sometime, me and my mate boots would come! thats 2! check out my myspace sometime http://www.myspace.com/benstavert
Keep up the good work
-Ben
Im so postmodern i vomit in a glass and pour water down the toilet.
I m so post modern that instead of buying ur CD I printed out the lyrics , stuffed them in my cd player and pressed play
Lucy is the most post modern person that i know… she is post post modern!
love barry
Ha Ha Ha you post-modernists
Purple chickens rule!
This may sound stupid but what exactly does Postmodern mean? or is it just an excuse to do silly stuf?
love the song btw
Whoo! 101 comments!!
omg we love this song its the best eba!!!!!
Mia Wallace,wanna have lunch some time? We could get a $5 shake =D
Just, can you feel the lurve? ^-^
Woooooooooo… :P
My postmodernism denotes only $6 shakes to be on my yellow- only diet.
Anyone else for a sequel?
BTW, to answer ‘It’s Meeeeeeee’s’ question, postmodern means to not follow the mainstream, maybe to not have anything to do with it, even predict or lead the way for the REAL cool people, and to be cool in your own right, kinda like Chris Martin.
Just for fun in spinning out the moral majority, it can even be like when in the Simpsons when Barney’s girlfriend goes, “I’ll have a single plum, served in perfume, floating in a man’s hat.” (!) As long as you feel comfortable, it’s whatever you make it. (This is what happens when you write an essay on it for visual arts at school!)
I’m so post modern i groupie’d this song then bagged it out on its own website and lied about it . :)
Mia – that’s meant to be Yoko Ono!!! The Simpsons Barber Shop quartets rise and fall reflects that of the Beatles, and Barney is John (RIP). So yeah.
That’s one of my favourite Simpsons lines ^-^
I knew it was meant to be Yoko, but what she said was just so funny in a postmodernist yoko sort-of way, you have to think it’s cool and laugh at it at the same time.Have you ever seen those postmodernists that take themselves so seriously it kinda funny? It’s fun, though! finally got my friends onto this song at school( Justin’s one, that is!)
NEW RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS OUT MAY 9!!! WOOOO!!!!!
*I beat up game show hosts with rusty curtain rods*
What about the episode where Maude Flanders dies and at one stage Homer says ‘there’s Yoko Ono…eww she ruined Plastic Ono Band.’ Mia, I’m not sure who you’re working for but I assure you that the chilli peppers album sales will be ‘red hot.’ I hear their advertising campaign this year is limited to a consortium of female ‘webspace team members’ targeting semi-obscure Australian folk singers’ guestbooks and the occasional footpath chalk message in Alice Springs. May 9 is the exact date my album was released. How coincidental!
im so postmodern that i grow tadpoles in condoms and right diaries on thier growth, in ancient greek
Hahaha! I’ve seen that one ^-^
I can’t believed you used the word ‘consortium.’
I love you so much Justin. In all definitions.
Everyone who’s looking forward to Justins next release raise your virtual hand.
Also – Mia Wallace – I don’t think you’re picking up my Pulp Fiction references.
This breaks my itty-bitty heart but hey..I’ll live. *stares wistfully into middle distance*
omg!!!!! i totally love this song and the film clips cool…….i cant stop laughing at it !!!!!
Oh yeah, I totally got those references, (so, I dare you to say “what!”) and I’m still waiting for the makers of fox force 5 to call me back. Anyway, Justin, if you too, want me to go post some lovely subliminal messages on Backstreet Boys.com praising the deep, meaningful lyrics of Megan the Vegan, consider it done!
Would you ever do an under-18’s show on the Central Coast of NSW?
And to Hannah Paige’s suggestion, I raise my virtual left foot.
By the way, I didn’t intend boys .com to be red, SO DONT GO TO IT!!! You might get a shock, unless you like that sorta thing!
OMG do a show in hobart!!
YAY meaghan is my hairdresser and dylan is emo…bad dylan!
Yes well, there ’s an eastern coast tour planned in late May, including Hobart! Hey, check out the I’m So Post Modern lyric workshop, located above the I’m So Pomo lyrics in Struth Be Told. It’s academic and fun! Mia I thought boys.com would be pictures of large plastic multicoloured balls floating in the sea…but no!
large plastic multicoloured balls sound very interesting though!!
lol
eeeew an old man was jacking off nest to my friend on the bus today….sooo wrong!!!
Oh please, stop right there.
I actually think there is a cult right now as we speak in Connecticut, USA devoted to the mysterious dimential intricascies of the Large plastic multicoured balls that float in the sea.
If anyone finds this cult, I’m not interested. I find delicate paper doilies served with tartar sauce and a side of grapes far more intriguing. eg; are you REALLY looking at the doilie, or is the doilie LOOKING AT YOU? Wooooo…
That quote on colored balls seriously should be put in a song, though.
P.S- I didn’t think stairway to heaven really had a satanic message when played backwards, but spicks and specks really opened my eyes… and just proves that some people have way too much time on their hands.
Yay for way too much time!!
(and spicks and specks) =)
by the way, i can’t find the acoustic megamix =(
I had to take the acoustic megamix down for a little while due to legal shananagins. (Ben Lee took a swing….he didn’t try and punch me he just stole my favourite swingset out of vengeance) It will be up again soon, hopefully. In the meantime, check out the Postmodern lyric writing concern in StruthBeTold section! Inquisitivity.
awww…ok =D
Bwahaha! I managed to wrangle that liddle corker onto my ipod before it had to be removed
*dances like a spud horse*
Hey Just, you have a twin here in Melbourne! He works at Coles and looks zackly like you!! Imagine that..he is called Gerard and wears headbands on the weekend.
Thanks for the explanation…. I feel a little bit like that already. Actually I’m just a nerd. But nerds rock!
and biology is boring.
You’re no nerd. Anyone that is proud of it is a postmodernist, and we all respect you for that =D
It also depends what type of Biology you’re talking about, cos’ I like when they talk about animals.
You sound like a fun person! Comment more!
you are Kricket
this song is my idol
p.s marry me
I first heard this song a few weeks ago when you played it on Triple J. I just wanted to say you’ve done a great job, thats the most random thing ive ever heard, fully original
Such a funny song. Congratulations on such a great piece of art, kinda reminds me of the art exhibition i never got invited to, although it only had a Chupa-chup stuck to a swimming cap. I’ve spread the word around to all my friends.
Keep writing such funny songs.
this song is hilarious. im so post modern that im not.
ha!
it was funny. once or twice. he can do better. it does inspire me to want to see his act live, so i guess its doing what it was written for.
Thank God for google… how else would I have found you and your gorgeous lyrics? Booyah, have found me a new website to browse while I’m at work…
INTERNET!!
Im so post moder i made paper feet for my fish, then threw it at a policeman
thank you mia for your ha! it made me smile. :)
ps: justin, big hello you are so good at making me chuckle – id practically sell my grandpa to hear you perform but i live far away from cities and am unable to for a while. thank goody goodness for jjj, huh?!
I’m so post-modern that i reallised that people who look at their feet when they walk are really just looking for the person who stole their shoes….
Nice Song…… I think that pretty much sums it up.
Anytime, LouLou.
Always interested in creative ideas…
yours was indeed that!
bit of a bookendian line, and we need more of those.
i love this song… it reminds me of the time i vacuumed up my sock. good work!
Funniest song ever! I have just one question
What the hell’s going on at the end?
Is it backwards, it it gibberish, can you help me out here, i’ve been trying to figure it out for ages.
it’s completely and totally random. I loved it, indescribable
PS:Scott, it’s meant to be gibberish
I’m so post modern I think this song is so yesterday.
…but I’ll hear it again tomorrow.
The bit at the end is adding onto the joke where he says “i’m so postmodern i recorded this song and laced it subliminally telling Shane porteus to buy a smock”
it is about the last 3/4 of the song reversed, indicating he really did put that message in there.
if you listen carefully you can hear him telling Shane Porteus to buy a smock.
Ingenious!
i hoped more peole would get that.
I heard this Song on TV late at night…god its funny!..Funniest song ever The Bedroom Philospher Rocks! I’m so Postmodern That I sit Down to pee and stand up to poo at job interviews…..
Can you please.. have tabs on your site I would Realy like to know how to play this song on guitar…..
You need tabs for this? C’mon, figure it out.
I heard this song on Triple J recently. I just stood there for the duration of the song laughing my head off; not something I do often.
Who cares if it doesn’t have any variation? :P It’s awesome.
I’m so postmodern I printed out a verse from this song and put it on the noticeboard above the students’ essay submission box.
I’m so post modren I play guitar, while wearing sunglasess i got from Elton John
~TWANG~
ah wow! mia replied to my reply! woot for me and still for this song. but bookendian? what a curious word. also, justin – folk star is pretty flipping great too. sorry about the purple star guy – i heard it on the radio and chuckled again! xo
this song is so shit but its good shit…
i love you chicken legz!
dis song is so shit!!
Im so postmodern I tied 37 chickens together, and hung them from the clothesline, with a USB cord…
Im so postmodern I send text messages to Payphones from a rusty old coke can, while standing on one leg…
Im so postmodern I covered my friends nuts is Satay sauce and got my dogs to lick it off while taking photographs…
Im so postmodern I died my hair fluorescent Purple, then died it black then Purple again, so no one could see…
Im so postmodern I drink Latte in a Taxi stand, wait for one to stop for me then hop on a bus…
Im so postmodern I play Pacman in an intersection, while sitting upside down on a sideways Galah…
Im so postmodern I bought 17 pet Turkeys, named them all Percible, then gave them to my Mum…
Im so postmodern that I sleep everywhere I go, then wake up and spend all day just standing on my bed…
Im so postmodern I defied the laws of gravity for 21 seconds, until I got bored…
Im so postmodern that I crawled into a Library, then made myself an Igloo and stayed overnight…
There’s 10 for you. Im too tired for the other 25. If only I could play guitar, too.
I just went through the guidelines, and I didnt realise there were four different types. Most of the ones I just put there are Standardina, but a few could be classed as Super-Syntax, unless Im just reading too slowly. So I’ve decided to have another go, and include all 4 types somehow. If not I’ll just have fun instead!
Ahem.
I’m so postmodern that I started my computer, I’ll finish it next week…
I’m so postmodern that I realised that multiball-entities are too hard to think of so I made this one a super-syntax…
I’m so postmodern that my Grandma disowned me, my Mother doesnt like me and my Neighbours dont care…
I’m so postmodern that my mates all live in Minibusses made by Toyota, before 1985…
I’m so postmodern that I havent gone to bed yet, I dont feel like going, and I dont think I ever will…
I’m so postmodern I sold carrots on e-bay, got a reply, and made fifty bucks…
I’m so postmodern I have no more need for currency, from now on I’ll just barter with whatever is in my pockets….
I’m so postmodern that Im going to quit my job today while looking for another one and staying unemployed….
I’m so postmodern that I boil up my Redbulls, in case of infections, caused by sheer neglect…
I’m so postmodern that I force myself to go to sleep while hanging from the Harbour Bridge with nothing but a tie…
I’m so postmodern I do radio shows in sign language, paint pictures in braile, while eating a capsicum…
I’m so postmodern that I keep running out of ideas, nope…
I’m so postmodern that I sign up to mailing lists with my name as my address, and my address as my phone number….
I’m so postmodern that I plucked 3 live chickens, in front of my teachers, in class for show and tell…
I’m so postmodern I got dumped by my Girlfriend, but refused to accept it, and were still going out…
I’m so postmodern I eat Chicken Noodle Soup, but only on a Thursday, and only when it rains…
I’m so postmodern in my mouth I stuck a lollipop, my eye I stuck a chimney and my nose a Kazooo…
I’m so postmodern I leave comments on the Bedroom Philosophers website telling him that I shall be back with some more…
man i love this song me and me mate made t-shirts that sed i’m so post modern i sit down 2 wee and stand up to poo at job interviews!! and i love this song 2 bits!!!
I’m so post-modern that I went to town, licked the carpet….and rolled over.
I’m so post-modern that I flatten my eyes, drink a bottle of tomato sauce, then spew up in your hair.
I’m so post-modern that I bought a kitchen table, glued to my neigbours cat, and name it Madonna
I’m so post-modern that I dressed up in garbage bags and caught the ferry…to toyworld.
Lol we actually are doing that last one. Great song dude.
meh …
It’s not so much post modern … more random
there’s a couple of lines i dig .. but for the most part it sounds like stoned randomness.
hey dude this is such a random song its ace as…man i am now the queen of randomness..ur my inspiration… woo hoo
Janelle i love you Xx
im so post moden that i do not use punctation
when i leave comments
on people blogs
I like this song!
im so post modern that i claim being friends with the snails in my garden and send them dinner invites… haha, dunno where that came from! :-/ your music is obviously influential!
im so post modern that i tried 2 be like batman and woke up in this bird sanctuary… im so post modern that i chase koalas up trees at 10 miles per hour and hug nectarines from a willow tree…
Stoned randomness????!!!!
if justin was stoned he’d be laughing at his own jokes the whole way through it and then walk off midway cos’ he had “the munchies.”
so… stoned?
more like…witty.
he makes it convincing.
that’s clever.
read his other blogs if you think he is just a stoned rambler…
he means stoned randomness as in it was random (which it obviously is, as it’s postmodern) and it was as solid as a stone. So he basically said it was solid (meaning good, it works, cripes I dont know the real definition) and it was random. Taking this further he basically called it good randomness. Good randomness can be interpreted as funny randomness and so that was a complement.
Sheesh, you should learn to take the benifit of the doubt.
On a serious note I’m actually postmodern and was very offended by this song… I would have gone to the nightclub at 2:37 in the afternoon and I dont like it when people stereotype postmodernists as the guys that are there at 3:00!
i’m so postmodern i bought a harmonica for my dead nan , dug her out of her grave , and put it in her mouth
i’m so postmodern i bought a shirt that doesnt fit me , cut off the sleeves and put it in the oven.
i’m so postmodern i read the same book 37 times a day , just so i can proove that i read chapter two.
i’m so postmodern that i rolled around in paint , got into an alley fight , so i could do some graffiti
i’m so postmodern i bought a set of enyclopedias , put the pages through the shredder and fed them to the pigeons.
these are just ones i made off the top of my head.
some of those were really good… now it’s time for MY pathetic attempts…
I’m so post modern that I subscribe to magazines, then tear out the pages, and show it to my friends.
Im so post modern i smash all my cutlery on the 3rd of each month, while skydiving naked?
I Love this song!!!
im so post modern that i turn on my tv, so my couch can watch it while i iron my sterio, in the other room
im so post modern i filled up my blowup swimming pool, with lots of chinese food, and used my legs as chopsticks
im so post modern that i bought a digital camera, to take photos of my toenails and send them to my nan
im so post modern that i try to find the full moon, in broard daylight in august, whilst wearing a golf hat
im so post modern that i chose blue jeans over black jeans, then took them to my nan, so she could dye them black
im so post modern that i bought a kitten, called it noodles gipter, then sang to it in spanish
im so post modern that i live in the middle east, worship their religion, then sing advance australia fair
im so post modern that i dance on my car, in the middle of melbourne, screamin long live the king
yeah thats all hehehe i love the song…..can u say RANDOM!!!!!!!?
I’m so post modern that I started a band, got famous, and before our first concert, drove off a bridge.
But really, I love the song and look forwardto a sequel.
I’m so postmodern that I feed my cat soap whenever he meows– as long as we are both not touching the ground.
I’m so postmodern that I took my car to the wash, broke all the machines, and then washed it myself.
i’m so postmodern i eat jellybeans on sunday and build houses with carrots.
Aloha! I haven’t dropped an e-five cents in a while. Thanks so much for your glorious compliments and Post Modern attempts. Please note I won’t be giving them feedback unless they’re in the Lyrics Masterclass bit of the website. Re: The earlier comment by ‘Evil R’ that the song is stoned randomness. I am with Mia Wallace on that. Why are people’s estimations of the power of the human mind so low, that we think it has to be effected with a drug to reach creative heights? From my experience’s of pot and the people that smoke it, the most ‘random’ comments usually revolve around ‘hey man where’s the remote’, ‘hey where’s the last three years?’ and ‘oh shitI think I’ve made my fragile mind more susceptible to developing mental illnesses such as schitzophrenia.’
im so postmodern i died my hair red, then went straight to the hairdressers and got it shaved off!
god, justin!!!!! why did u have to have the comments place change every wingding thing people say??????????????????????????
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
This is a great song, makes me laugh every time. Absolute Gold. This is the theme song my bunch of friends need!
good for u!
i’m so postmodern i went to google and searched for google, clicked i feel lucky and repeated it all again!
why does http://www.pouritonthelawn.com not exist?????????????????????????????????????
that is a very good question…
Justin, you would know the answer. You know everything. Now answer the question…
*is not being rude*
I’m so post modern that i use words like polychromatic, lethologica and sciamachy, even if it’s not in context
I’m so post modern i inspired a triology of books told from the perspective of a possum I patted once.
You guys are weird. Although I’m so postmodern I started my own religion, wrote a holy document and burned it for blasphemy
hahaha.. i met him and got a signed copy of his cd yesterday :)
I’m so post modern i listened to the film clip whilst trying to download the whole album and i only found this one song so i bought 2 cd’s because i felt guilty about using the internet to get free music…….
i like song
i still like song
Hey there…
I saw you perform two tuesdays ago (couldn’t work out a way to write that, that would make sense) at melbourne uni before tripod. I’m only in high school so i had to pretend to be a uni kid so i could see tripod : ) and heard you do “I’m So Post Modern” before them…hilarious…definately made a great funny day for me greater and funnier (specially since i was sposed to be doing a massive french test that day)…and i’m attempting to buy your cd…it’s a must have. Ok i think this comments too long so i shall go…
I’ve been told I look postmodern… I don’t know If they told me that so I’d listen to this song, or if I listened to that song because they told me I looked post modern O.o
This song is so good I BOUGHT the cd… and that is saying alot for me.
I’m not that post-modern… but I’m post-modern enough to look through windows of coffee shops and wave at people I dont acutally know!
hey i looked for pouritonthelawn.com too! doesn’t exist ………………. DARN! how sad. i think it should. : )
wink wink nudge nudge
I’m so post modern that i moved to tasmania, took my pet snail on a leash and started a coup.
I’m so post modern that i had a baby with peter beattie, ate the placenta and called it gavina.
Hey does anyone know where i can buy the CD that’s not over the internet? if anyone knows i would be very happy : )
Hi Lysh – If you mean the album ‘In Bed With My Doona’ then it can be ordered from any record store in Australia. The maxi-single is only available by mail order. I hope this answers your question. I just watched Australian Idol and now feel ill.
Hey Justin, thanks for that. Once i get paid at work this week, i’m going to go and buy it. Hazaah! I’m kinda poor…I just spent all my cd income for this week on Beck’s new Cd-The Information. But it was definately worth it : ) . But soon…. . You were watching Australian idol? oh i’m ashamed. Tsk tsk tsk. NO wonder you feel ill. All you need is a good dose of real tv. (Black books, Lano and Woodley, Shaun Micalleff etc). That’s my prescription. Now make sure you watch something quality you hear? (P.s , i don’t know if you read above…but thanks for getting me out of my french test : ) What a fun day that was, saw you and tripod in the one day. ) Catch.
Now go and watch real TV
im so post modern that i bought a watermelon and stuck a pump into it, and dropped it out of a plane
im so post modern that iv edone everything this song says because i lov eit so much
why dosent somebody create http://www.pouritonthelawn.com
im so pst modern i carry around my large pc on a huge extension cord and call it a portable computer
im so post modern i was postmodern before there was any modern to be post about
i love this song.. so much.. my idol… can you emial me at boo_goo_lala@hotmail.com
please
please
please
please
please
please
please
please
please
please
please
please
I’m so post modern i eat anchovies, while standing on my head, with a mexican hat on my feet.
Im so post modern I steal old people wheelchairs, park my car in disabled zones, then dance on my bonet.
Im so post modern I sent my self a letter, telling me of my funeral, cause I died of conjunctavitus.
Im so post modern I study movement, set up a boom-box, and pertent Im a rock.
Im so post modern I slept with Amanda Vanstone, when we were doing it, I called out Gorge Clooney.
Im so post modern I protest naked, at the Vatican, for the rights of genital lice.
Im so post modern I covered my self in honey, ran through a retierment village, i came out not as sticky.
Im so post modern I sent my self a letter, telling me of my funeral, cause I died of conjunctavitus.
Im so post modern I study movement, set up a boom-box, and pertent Im a rock.
Im so post modern I slept with Amanda Vanstone, when we were doing it, I called out Gorge Clooney.
Im so post modern I protest naked, at the Vatican, for the rights of genital lice.
Im so post modern I had a conversation with my self, it turned in to a argument, now we aren’t talking.
Im so post modern I made out with a transvetite, when I found out, I bort him a beer.
Im so post modern I kidnapped B1, sent a finger to B2,threttenning to peel him.
Im so post modern I dressed up as Osama Bin Larden, went to Geoge Bushes funial, and hitted on his mum.
peace&love x
I love you
and your song
its great ;)
when i grow up i want be just like you……Random
i idolise you
im so post modern that i backpacked through india, bought a llama, called it soup and sent it to the mafia
I’m so post modern I joined an internet website and put myself on my ignore list
I’m so post-modern that I bought a pet kangaroo and tied him to a broom and tought him how to drive
>>>ThIs Is ThE MoSt fUnNiEst SoNG ThAt I HaVe eVeR HeaRD…funnny aaaaaassssssss
omgh!
best song in the whole intire world!!!!
lol.. i laughed til i cried… n that neva happens!!!
thanx em 4 showin it 2 me
triple j rock.. but do they play ur song?
ive neva heard it on ther b4.. but by the looks of wat ppl hav sed.. they do.. so i will keep my ears open
thanx 4 inspiring me!!
call me.. lol
yeah
what an awesome tune!!
=)
it’s great!
especially the bit that goes “i’m so post modern i write 4000 word essays on the cultural significance of party pies”
love lucy
I’m so post modern that i Tan in a deck chair, while playing with matches at midnight in the rain.
I’m so post modern I stole a top-hat from a midget, Stuck it in my trousers, to protect me from a goat
BTW great idea! my shirts are so crisp now. And i can barely believe i used to eat un-ironed lettuce
- from Jonathon
c0ol sweet awesome wicked awesomecool
I’m so postmodern I listen to philosophers on my underwater radio while driving to launceston.
makes the trip go that 5 minutes 11 seconds faster!
HOORAY!!!
I saw you mr. bedroom philosopher playing at Aroma Records in North Hobart some months ago. and oh how it was brilliant.
try this trick and spin it – YEAH!
i STILL laugh at this song an i’ve been listening to it constantly for the past MONTH.
i did send a letter to someone.. it was S.
I’m so post modern I brought a cow and named it penguin then gave it a pineapple.
I’m so post modern I talk to myself on msn.
heya i am molly i love this song so much can u plz send it to my i want it at my birthday party ……….
love yaz
heya mates ii’s bek wow this song is pretty much going off haha i lovez it….. who eva made it up is so on my wedding list lol ….. xoxo love yaz darlings
well if it isnt the old postmodern song lol we go way back to funky town lol
yea i no awesome….. well this is my number one song lol
xoxo
I’m was post modern before it was post modern to be post modern.
I’m so post modern that I have a Siamese twin-in-law whom I’ve taught to produce goat’s milk so I don’t have to.
I’m So Postmodern that I use my phone to speak with aliens from mars that are really my cousins that are stuck in their costumes from halloween five years ago.
this song rocks my hair off my head.
much peace.
i like pie. and this song. and many other various things of an awesome nature.
I’m so Post-Modern I gave up my first born in exchange for three seconds of exposure to moon dried pickles.
My name is Al Gore.
thats where my recycling bin went to. Katie is my friend. And so is this computer. and the bones on her diary. I will eat all your souls. One by one, slowly at first, then faster and faster til the tin cans come for revenge.
Piggle, I know who you are. I watch you day and night. (especially night = D) I love you.
I’m so postmodern I talk about hyphonating postmodern but don’t do it.
This song is so fucking cool
Wow! I wish i had been introduced to your music and ways sooner, this was the first song of yours i ever heard and its won my heart over! And that was as i went to sleep last night listening to a some songs a mate gave me … I’m going to have to dash out now and buy the Cd …
I’m so postmodern that I call my mother from a trash can, I collect three monkeys and she gives me a shoe.
My teenage son thought I would like this – I do. Very Unique
justin….you are queer and this postmodern biznasss is it a joke. please move back to the gay cult you were in before you decided writing music
Awww – look everybody, a real live homophobe, out in the wild! He’s spelling and everything…he thinks he’s people…!
LOVE the track…. LOVE it….. if only mor folks were inclined to bring joy and enlightenment to the world like you!!!! Loved it so much i used a couple of lines in an essay for uni on “ORIGINALITY AND APPROPRIATION IN POSTMODERNISM”!!!!
Hope i get good marks!!!!!!!!
(P.S. you should’ve rated higher in the hottest 100!!!! Dammit)
HAHAHAHAHA..
im so postmodern that i eat uhu glue sticks. i also eat lipsmackers, but only if they’re tasty……
(the sad thing is, it’s true..)
this song is the bomb!!! the best line has to be “I’m so postmodern I went home and typed up everything you said and printed it out in wingdings and gave it back to you.
” wingdings! lol!!!!
p.s. DIE BERNARD FANNING im so post modern should have been number one in the hottest one hundred!
sweeeeeet song
im so post modern that i scream the alphabet in in ancient greek to destiny’s child, whilst hibernating.
im so postmodern i use shredded pyjamas for my cereal and excrete multicoloured glad wrap, through my fingernails.
im so postmodern that i jump climb up lightbulbs with the help of an in cartridge, with my shoes off.
i feel like dressing up as a clown and singing this song upside down in a water tank of nazi submarines. at least that’ll make more sense then singing it normally.
im an idiot and this song rocks. ok cool CATCHY babes. sam collins makes me wanna vomit out my ass
hi i am molly does anyone need a friend … coz i do i dont have one
ilove this song i clean the house to it
you are my idols, i want to marry you all one day!!!
i love your songs!!!
who cares about jake
apparently http://www.pouritonthelwn.com isnt a site…lol i love your song tho
I’m so postmodern, I found another bloke. We stood on a table, and sang Underneath the Arches.
justin.
your amazing.
and i was wondering if you had ukulele/harmonica/guitar tabs for this ingenius song?
its so overly obscure and amazing that im going to sing it and busk at my school so i can feed myself for a day.
however after second thoughts it could be a little hard to sing this song whilst playing in the harmonica…
anyway whatever you have
cheers
Am i too late to join Justin’s Army? aww :(
before i found out about you, whenever i heard “Post Modern” i used to think of that episode of the simpsons where Moe makes his bar “hip” and pomo, he has a video of an eyeball looking around the room… just looking…. just one…
your about the same age as my sister… COINCIDENCE??? i think NOT…
I’m so postmodern that I made a model of stoned weasels, submitted it to a novel, then stole it in my sleep.
Good work, Mr B.P.
PS.
Hope to see you on Friday.
I’m so postmodern I think this song is awesome.
But seriously, I like the pickle one.
LOL.
I’m so postmodern I took a watermelon, put a bomb inside, and dropped it out of an airplane.
Boom!
Haha, love this song
I’m so postmodern that I speak in semiphore to my blind nephew while tapdancing really fast
Love this song :D
I’m so post modern I posted this in 2005 from inside a clock and you’re only seeing it now because of the time difference.
Hey Momo, that’s pretty sweet…I like the reference to 2005. Ah, I’d spiritually disconnected myself from this song, for various reasons, I really couldn’t remember the order of the lyrics any more (it’s very hard memorising list songs) and have you tried playing it a hundred times? Then, the other night I listened to In Bed With My Doona for the first time in four years or so and this song really jumped out and I thought ‘oh yeah, no wonder people still like it’ and I plan to do Edinburgh Fringe this year and I think I’ll relearn most of the lyrics and fire it back up and do a world tour and await the telemovie.
I’m so postmodern I quote myself in conversations and say things like “wow, multiculturalism has become so hegemonic!”
I just discovered this song, and it made my life.
I’m so postmodern I spell words using their meanings, like sdrawkcab or syl-la-bles, or gamanra or umop-3p!sdn.
I’m so postmodern I ask hobos for spare spare change, and call the bouncers outside clubs, by the feminine form of their names.
I’m so postmodern I double cross dress as myself, and hand out zines promoting capitalism, at shelters for the illiterate poor.
I’m so postmodern I record my sexual history, written from my mum’s perspective, on my girlfriends’ pantry doors.
My music is fairly powerful.
Justin: “My music is fairly powerful.”
It is. You’re this generation’s Justin Bieber.
I’m so postmodern I have wild nights out with snowmen, upload pictures onto Facebook, and tag strangers surnamed ‘White’.
I’m so postmodern I write things like ‘Benji poked you’, ‘poke him back’ and ‘whats on your mind?’, on my dead nan’s bedroom wall.
I’m so postmodern I bombard the set of Neighbours, and perform spot interventions, to the tune of the song ‘Girlfriend’.
“Hey, hey! You, you! You’ve got a drinking problem.. No way! No way! You’re hurting all your loved ones.. Hey, hey! You, you! Wey’re gonna lock you up now..”
Haha, I just Last.fm ‘ed you and apparently you are super similar (musically) to Yves Klein Blue. Explain please?
Coming to your show tomorrow night, so I’m hoping I’ll see you there.
Um…
I’m so postmodern that I make anything a verb by putting ‘ed on the end of it.
I’m so postmodern that I actually take philosophy…
I’m so postmodern i replaced all but five birds with mirrored planes then made them each a sweater