It was 2003 rock music was in trouble
All the cool ‘the’ bands had finally burst their bubble
The Strokes put out a Christmas album called ‘Santa Cruz’
It was met with hisses and boos

The Vines went all experimental
Their Gregorian thrash jazz drove everybody mental
The UK press were looking for the next rock saviour
Kevin Plunkett’s phone rang somewhere in Tasmania

A bootlegged recording of his high school band
Had somehow found its way into the hands
Of the editor of NME magazine
Cos it’s all about luck in this industry

Yeah he liked their sound it was raw it was different
I don’t think he realised they couldn’t play their instruments
He said they were the best new band that he’d heard in yonks
When he asked what they were called Kevin just coughed so

The Coughs single handedly saved rock ‘n’ roll
Oh with the help of their music teacher Mrs Knoll

The record company thought that they were ready
They had their parents permission and pocket money aplenty
They played a farewell gig at their high school assembly
The very next week they were packin out Wembley

Their set was kinda short they only knew three songs
Each had three chords and was three minutes long
But no-one seemed to notice ‘cos they looked so rock
In school uniforms untucked and non-curriculum socks so

The Coughs single handedly saved rock ‘n’ roll
For at least ten days until the next band came along

Kevin Plunkett was the man he had so many fans
When he single handedly toilet papered Oasis’ tour van


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