This morning I woke
With a feeling of dread
From the holes in my socks
To my doona-do head
I had a PM breakfast
Did my hair with a hat
Found some old sunnies
And let out the cat
(out you go Siobahn)
I track panted my way down the street
Gave a busker a knowing snort
I butted out my smoke
I was broke no joke
The doldrums beat
Inside last weeks shirt
I walked through the automatic doors
AUTOMATIC
HYDROMATIC
INSTAMATIC
Bored
Then I saw you
Like a shot of Kahlua
Among the manure

You looked divine
In the Centrelink line
Wearing designs
From 1999
Your fortnightly form
Employs my eyes
It’s a fulltime job
And I can’t lie

I wanted to make a general enquiry
And let you read all of my diary
I wanted to know your name
Your date of birth
Your mobile reference number
If you happen to have it handy
I wanna be your touch screen
And give you all 100 points
Of my ID yeah
You don’t need Medicare
I’ll give you ready care
You ain’t a jobseeker
Baby you’re a heat seeker
Cos I could line up for hours in your eyes
And not get very bored
Unlike the plants in here
My love is real
I know right now our lives are so far apart
But baby I’m just asking for a
New Start
I know right now you seem to be
So out of range
But please let me know
If any of these details change
Cos it’s a fact
Oh
I wanna be your De facto
Yeah
You’re my Centrelink
You’re my doll
I just want
To work for your soul
Forget debts
Forget HECS
Well baby
Let’s talk about
Next
You looked divine
In the Centrelink line
Wearing designs
From 1999
Your fortnightly form
Employs my eyes
It’s a fulltime job
And I can’t lie
Oh no
(repeat Chorus till employed)

 

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