(Brought to you by ‘flatulale! The controversial new musical caravan by
Les bowel irritables )
• For Christmas from my mum and nan and pop I got an organiser, (a book, not a
paid helper), thongs, chocolate, a ‘tranquil Australia 2005’ calander, some
socks, some second hand thermal singlets my nan got off a friend, some new
shirts (a couple weren’t my scene, so mum said we could cash them back in at
kmart, god bless her), some after shave conditioning lotion and $50.
• I have gone onto the Vodafone ‘$80 call cap’ thing. You get $500 worth of
calls monthly for $80. It’s a great deal but I can’ t afford it and don’t know
what I’m doing. I downloaded some radiohead ringtones for novelty value and
they counted as extra. If I perform them on stage then it’s tax deductible.
• Nan accidentally trod on the budgie, Taddy, on Christmas morning and he was
not very well. (shivering, falling asleep, feeling hard done by) he’s okay now.
Nan teaches him to say things. He can say ‘Heazlewood’ but not Taddy,
ironically. (is that irony?)
• When walking down Brunswick Street in Melbourne recently, an old lady walked
past and said to me ‘go back to 1973.’
* The falls festival was lovely, apart from my predictable mood swings (I
suffer from emotional hangovers from thinking too much all year). I played to
about 1500 people. I did a rampant interpretive dance throughout the audience
to ‘launch’ my CD and lost my flip top glasses. Then one girl asked me
sincerely if she could have my baby. I will write a gig report on this at a